Where am I?

The best place to find me these days is marriage receptions – somewhere near the food counters. I’ll have about 2-3 or max 4 food items in my dish so that I don’t have to pay much attention to balancing the dish over the tissue paper. I know, that’s a smart act.

Lately, I’ve made few observations about myself. There are typical I follow in any marriage reception hall. For example, I ignore the crowd and pick up the cucumber & carrot slices with hand. In ‘loose terms’, I ‘hand pick’ the slices.

When picking up the spoons & forks, I attempt for the ones that are hiding deep inside the pile of spoons [Note: look, not every reception I attend is hosted at a 5 star hotel]. The logic is that, the spoon/fork I picked up has high chance of being untouched -> so they’ll have least number of bacteria (Kitanu {pronounced: Key-taa-noo} - is the new word) -> good hygiene.

When standing in line for the food, like prisoners, I strategize my position taking into consideration who’ll be  immediately behind and in front of me. See, this saves me from lot of trouble. People with lot of items in their plates are bound to give you a “sticky” on your sleeve, followed by a polite ‘sorry’ (damn this word!). The person immediately in front of you will turn all suddenly so that his/her food laden dish collides with yours.

I don’t struggle to pick the paneer pieces from the Panee Butter Masala pool.Never. One try is enough!

I never have difficulty in spotting the dish collection basket & water counter.

I’d normally (like 20% of the times) come out of the food hall un-stained.

But 100% of time times, I return home appreciating the home-made-food.

-The Big K-