I’ve this nagging feeling that I’m not 100% attentive to my kid; whenever she needs me. I didn’t set out a ‘traditional office’ and decided to keep working out of home while my kid is a kid; which is going to be a very short time and I don’t want to miss out on any of the moments. So far, I’ve been lucky to watch her first step, first reaction to testing lemon, and several other ‘firsts’. This is something that’s incredible and I’ll never have the chance to experience this again. To some, this may not be important at all; but to me it is. Working out of home allows me to be around when my kid needs me; but I’m still not able to attend her all the times. My parents do all of the ‘taking care’ part, and it’s no easy task to handle a smart kid. You’ve to be always on the toes, if you aren’t the types who’ll make the kid sit in front of TV so that your ‘troubles’ are minimized.
Parenting isn’t an easy task – and it requires extra-ordinary patience and super-activeness. I think most of the ‘modern parents’ lack it. They lack it to the extent that they’d quickly outsource all the parenting to others; so that they be ‘free’. Here are examples of outsourced parenting-
1. Make the kid sit in front of TV all the time watching idiotic songs, dances or cartoons.
2. Hand over the kid to the most active person who’s volunteering to attend to the kid – whenever you’re at a social gathering.
3. Send the kid to playgroup throughout the day.
4. Always look out for someone who is willing to attend to your kid so that you can ‘breath’.
5. Recruit a maid / caretaker / baby sitter to attend your kid all day.
Of course, the dim witted people reading this article would quickly ‘imagine’ that I’m advocating that you shouldn’t make your kid ‘social’ and rather make them ‘stick’ to you all the time. You see, that is NOT the point here. But I see the trend among most modern moms and dads looking for chances to find someone to take care of their kids. In short, looking for chances to outsource parenting!
I think the ‘real’ reason behind this ‘outsourced parenting’ is that most ‘modern’ parents have become ‘lazier’. They’ve become lazier at core in the mindless race for ‘appearing active & busy’. They’ll make you believe that their work leaves them frustrated and tired; and they’ll NEVER find out solution to fix those problems. Reason? They’ve a lazy brain & body to really figure out ways to fix problems. So the best way is to ‘deny’ the problem in first place.
The Bad Outcomes Of Outsourced Parenting
The outcomes of outsourced parenting are similar to the effect of nicotine. It’s slow and by the time you realize that things are out of your hands; it’s late. VERY late. The first outcome is that you’ll realized that your Kid has no ‘connect‘ with you. It will be slow; but the kid will have realized points 1-5 over the years. You’ll have to ‘pretend’ in public that there’s a strong bond; but it won’t exist. Why am I saying that? Because I’ve seen this happening.
Second – there will be no way to fix the situation. You won’t just be able to CTRL+Z things. You’ll then try to make up for the damage with ‘money’ and ‘gifts'; which would essentially be a move to buy some love and it will fail.
Third – the growing kid will have a very little self-confidence or ability to think independently. Maybe this explains why I see so many dull people these days. I strongly believe that it’s the ‘connect’ the kid has with parents that makes them truly ‘independent’ and self-confident. You may debate with me; but that’s true.
Fourth – The kids won’t be there when you’ll need them. Because you did the same to them.
Fifth – You’ll miss out on all the bestest of the things in life.
But you should thank God that he/she sent you on the Earth will a dull brain to really understand, appreciate & ponder over the the things I’ve written above.